Page 209 - The Mirror of My Soul. Vol. 1

Nicolai Levashov. The Mirror of My Soul. Vol. 1. Born in the USSR

off”. In the evening be-fore our departure, as I already mentioned, I had invited Norbert

Steuler to a restaurant, the following morning we came to his office to say goodbye and
started our journey back home, each in his own car. It was for me both training and a
test for driving. We drove out onto the autobahn, pointed ourselves in the right direction
and drove as fast as our cars would go.

We drove from the south to the north, deviating gradually to the east for quite long
time. We chose our route so that while moving to the north, we would also be heading
east, avoiding Berlin, then take the road which crossed Poland from east to west and
reach the Soviet border in Brest (Belorussia). We stopped only at gas-stations—to re-
fuel and purchase water or food. It turned out that my companion for “some” reason had
to go to the rest room whenever it was time to pay. His stomach “suffered” a strange
disorder—so profitable for its owner.

I continued to observe my last student. Money never had power over me, but I
always had to earn it by working hard. No one ever came and gave me money either in

the form of a gift or in any other form. To tell the truth, I would not accept such gifts. I
feel awkward, if someone does me a favour. Therefore, I always preferred to earn money
myself.

Besides, I never believed that someone would come and offer money so that I could
realize my plans and projects. Correctly saying, I was offered everything my soul could
ever wish for, but I could not accept what was asked in return for this “manna from
heaven”. I did not worry over money, although I understood that without money it was
almost impossible to obtain anything, especially that, to which I dedicated my life.
Nevertheless, I did not respect users—people who are only interested in raking in the
money for themselves.

My fellow traveller showed his true “user” personality, which peeped through the
mask more evidently with every day. I liked it less every time. One fact was very
characteristic—before our departure he decided to buy another suit, but this time
spending his own money. “Oddly” enough, he chose a suit much cheaper than the one I
bought him. There is no need to continue; this in itself, says a lot.

It was sad for me to see how people who said beautiful words about lofty matters
somehow forgot about them at once when facing reality, when it concerned them, their
own interests and their benefit. All lofty ideals were immediately forgotten and they
converted into the usual scroungers. Most likely, there was no real core in them and the
great spirit of their ancestors degenerated in them. Precisely this was the aim of the
enemies of man, destroying the cream of the Russian nation—the Ruses!

But, nevertheless, I believed that one day I would find the real people who would

become comrades-in-arms, not just fellow-travellers who were your “friends” until the
first danger arose. Despite all this, I knew and believed that the day would come when
the ancestral memory woke up in people and they would want to be free from spiritual
slavery again.

But I also knew that people would not wake up by themselves and that I needed to
battle with enemies which immersed people in this “dream” and I prepared myself to
battle alone! I did not know then that I would meet a human being—my future wife
Svetlana—who would become not only spiritually close to me and then my wife, but

also my first comrade-in-arms in my war with those enemies of human beings—social

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