Page 259 - The Mirror of My Soul. Vol. 1
P. 259

Nicolai Levashov. The Mirror of My Soul. Vol. 1. Born in the USSR

                After  this  solo  someone  from  the  jury  told  me  that  I  should  take  up  singing

           professionally and that there was a very good vocal studio at the university. In a couple
           of weeks I decided to go there and studied singing until I graduated from the university.
           I did not aspire to sing in public. I was more interested in learning to manage my voice,
           which I did. The vocal studio was run by Tamara Nikolaevna, if I am not mistaken, a
           professional singer of the Kharkov opera. I am very grateful to her for my voice training.

                One almost comic episode also helped me to combat my nervousness on stage. As
           I was one of the vocalists, I had to participate in the next amateur concert of the Kharkov
           University. As usual, all this was done trusting to luck. An accordionist, with whom I
           had never rehearsed and per-formed before, accompanied all of us. I gently sang him the
           melody of my song. He quickly under-stood what kind of song I was going to sing, but
           because of the lack of time we were unable to re-hearse even once.

                Well, my entrance was announced and he began to play an octave higher than he
           should! What a situation! I was forced to follow the much higher than normal melody.
           Certainly I “sang” the first verse and on the second one roared at him: “Lower, play it

           lower…” Certainly, it turned out very funny, but strangely enough, this situation allowed
           me to disconnect myself fully from the stage and the audience. After this I felt quite with
           ease, when coming to the stage. I could be nervous before, but when I stepped out onto
           the stage, I was fully immersed in the activity, for which I was there.

                When I was a student, I often had to organize different student parties and new-
           year masquerades and take part in the performances. Together with my fellow-students
           I made “fancy dress” for these parties and wore them during our performances. Once I
           even had to write a script for the whole party and compose ditties for a student new-year
           party. I still remember several verses. Everything happened as is usual in student’s skits:
           a lot of humour, some irony, most of all we laughed at ourselves. I and another fellow
           from the choir were both presenters and performers. I played Grandfather Frost (Santa
           Claus),  while Igor Iovenko,  who  was almost  the  same  height  as  me,  was  the  Snow
           maiden (Santa’s granddaughter). We both had moustaches then and for the first time in
           my life I shaved mine off, expressing my solidarity with him. In short, we all had fun.

                I’ve described my attitude toward the stage in order to show that I had to work on
           myself a lot to even go out onto the stage. Thanks to this I feel confident, even in front
           of  a  hostile  audience  and  despite  whatever  tricks  from  the  opposition,  enemies  or
           sceptics I am able to convey to people what I consider necessary. It turned out that every
           situation in my life prepared me for what I do now.

                At the same time, in order for these situations to bring me to what I am now, I had
           to work on myself a lot, to create myself. These situations were the external force which
           made me do all this. So, judging by my own experience I can say that everything that
           happens to us is for the best (certainly, if you gather all your will and refuse to break you
           can compel circumstances to work in your favour!). It turned out that almost everything
           that happened in my life, one way or another, prepared me for the path of a warrior. In
           principle,  any  movement  forward  is  a  way  of  overcoming  both  one-self  and
           circumstances. This is how things work.

                Let us return to Arkhangelsk. Here I was—standing on-stage and several hundred
           pairs of eyes stared at me and everyone wanted something from me (very often it was
           not that which I would like to give them). The main purpose of my educational -curative


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